LIVING FOR OTHERS

Jesus said to His disciples, “For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give His life as a ransom for many.”  (Matthew 20:28 NLT)

Rivers do not drink their own water; trees do not eat their own fruit; the sun does not shine on itself; and flowers do not spread their fragrance for themselves. Living for others is a rule of nature. We are all born to help each other. No matter how difficult it is… Life is good when you are happy; but much better when others are happy because of you. 

-- Pope Francis (1936 – 2025)

#6103

DO YOU WANT HELP?

“One who was there had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, Jesus asked him, ‘Do you want to get well?’”  (John 5:5-6 NIV)

Who wouldn’t want help? Someone in denial of reality.

I imagine after so many years, the man at the pool no longer has a healthy idea of what life could be if he stood and moved about town and took ownership of his life. Time did its thing, but so did environment. He spent every day and every night surrounded by hurting people. The world was compressed to the bounds of those five colonnades that defined the pool at Bethesda. He wasn’t around too many healthy people, so unhealthy had become his new normal.

I watched a documentary about a thirty-four-year-old woman who had a three-hundred-pound tumor removed from her body. The tumor itself was twice the size of her initial body weight. It was a very horrific thing to see, needless to say. As the filmmakers documented this surgery, it was clear that they wondered why she had waited until the tumor was the size it was. All she could really say was that she didn’t get help because she figured it would go away on its own.

The tumor was unique, but the attitude was not. We figure that our finances will sort themselves out it time. But the credit card debt keeps piling up, and still we keep spending. The tumor is growing.

We figure our teenage daughter will change her behavior and get with the program. Meanwhile, she’s starting to cut herself. She’s beginning to fall in with a very unhealthy group of kids, and she’s moving further away from God by the day, but we decide to be patient. The tumor is growing.

We figure the problems in our marriage will fade away on their own if we don’t address them. Who says we need help? Just ordinary husband-and-wife-stuff, and it is nobody else’s business. And within a few months, we’re sleeping in separate rooms and he’s feeling an attraction to someone at work. The tumor is growing.

Jesus asks, “Do you want to get well?” Why not ask for help? 

-- Kyle Idleman in “The End of Me: Where Real Life in the Upside-Down Ways of Jesus Begins” 

#5973

IN TIMES OF SORROW

“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”  (Colossians 3:12-13 NIV)

Many people have told me they “don’t know what to say” to the family of someone who has died and, sadly, for fear of saying the “wrong thing,” end up saying nothing at all. People in mourning need our support. In times of sorrow, one word, one gesture, can mean everything.

Each one of us must take the initiative. Hold someone’s hand. Send a poem [or Scripture verse], a photograph, a letter of remembrance. If you buy a card, add a personal message. If you feel awkward, simply say, “I’ve been thinking of you.” This will create an opening. Don’t ask what you can do. Anticipate and act. Listen. Be compassionate. Don’t give advice, philosophize, or tell the person you know how they’re feeling. You don’t. Statements such as “it was God’s will” or “Your loved one is better off now” are insensitive sentiments, akin to a poke with a sharp stick. It’s best to be true to yourself and to the person who has died. If you knew them well, create a picture, a memory of a time you spent together, for his or her family -- a night at the movies, an afternoon over a cup of tea, an ongoing joke only known to the two of you -- the most common recollection has uncommon meaning to people in mourning, particularly if it’s a story they’ve never heard. You have different memories than they do. Think of your reminiscence as a tiny eulogy, an addition to their family archives, and know that if it comes with compassion the contribution will be welcome. 

-- Nancy Cobb in “In Lieu of Flowers: A Conversation for the Living”

#5695

FEAR OF CHANGE

“Now a certain man was there who had an infirmity thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there [by the pool], and knew that he already had been in that condition a long time, He said to him, ‘Do you want to be made well?’”  (John 5:5-6 NKJV)

Who wouldn’t want help? Someone afraid of change.

This man was sick for quite a duration. At a point approaching four decades, it was the only life he knew. He may not have liked it, but he learned to survive as a beggar. Times were tough, but on the upside he hadn’t had to learn a trade or put his back into hard work. His home was his mat. His community was the pool, and he was who he was. It’s amazing what people can learn to endure.

And isn’t there a touch of this man in all of us? We accept a lot of things that we know could be better. We say, “Well, that’s just my life,” as if it’s engraved in stone. We decide God must want us to be here, because if he didn’t, he’d make something else happen. In other words, we blame God. And if it’s God’s fault that we are in the situation we are in, then why would we ask Him for help?

After a while we get used to things, and a limited life is less frightening than the thought of change. Resignation is better than disappointment. 

-- Kyle Idleman in “The End of Me: Where Real Life in the Upside-Down Ways of Jesus Begins”

#5342

“HELPING” BUILD THE KINGDOM

As I feverishly pushed the lawn mower around our yard, I wondered if I'd finish before dinner.  Mikey, our 6-year-old, walked up and, without even asking, stepped in front of me and placed his hands on the mower handle.  Knowing that he wanted to help me, I quit pushing.

The mower quickly slowed to a stop.  Chuckling inwardly at his struggles, I resisted the urge to say, "Get out of here, kid.  You're in my way," and said instead, "Here, Son.  I'll help you."  As I resumed pushing, I bowed my back, leaned forward, and walked spread-legged to avoid colliding with Mikey.  The grass cutting continued, but more slowly and less efficiently than before, because Mikey was "helping" me.

Suddenly, tears came to my eyes as it hit me: This is the way my heavenly Father allows me to "help" Him build His kingdom!  I pictured my heavenly Father at work seeking, saving, and transforming the lost, and there I was with my weak hands "helping".  My Father could do the work by Himself, but He doesn't.  He chooses to stoop graciously to allow me to co-labor with Him.  Why?  For my sake, because He wants me to have the privilege of ministering with Him. 

-- Rusty Stephens

#5123

COMFORTING OTHERS

"God comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When others are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us."  (2 Corinthians 1:4 NLT)

The Greek word for comfort means “to give forth sighs, to call alongside, or to help.” The English definition is “to ease, encourage, inspirit, or enliven.” Comfort combines encouragement with easing of grief. “God does not comfort us to make us comfortable, but to make us comforters.”  (John Henry Jowett)

-- Quoted in “Pathway to God’s Treasure: Ephesians” by Lenya Heitzig and Penny Pierce Rose

#4949

HOW IS IT WITH YOUR SOUL? - Part 2

“Christ encourages you, and His love comforts you. God’s Spirit unites you, and you are concerned for others. Now make me completely happy! Live in harmony by showing love for each other. Be united in what you think, as if you were only one person. Don’t be jealous or proud, but be humble and consider others more important than yourselves. Care about them as much as you care about yourselves.”  (Philippians 2:1-4 CEV)

John Wesley’s question, “How is it with your soul?” can help make sure that we still find life in things that we may have taken for granted because of their routine-ness.

Someone once told me that prayer is to our souls as breathing is to our bodies. Wesley’s question helps me to make sure my soul is breathing. Reminding me… to pause… to pray… to wonder… to be in awe… to laugh… to cry… to sing. It reminds me that it’s OK to be human. And that it’s more than OK to admit that I’m not doing well and need a little help from my friends.

Maybe you could benefit from asking yourself, “How is it with my soul?” Or maybe you could help someone by asking how their soul is and then genuinely listen to their response. It’s an important question that we should ask and answer frequently.

-- Adapted from Joseph Yoo in “Ministry Matters” Blog


#4811

THE PARADOX OF SERVANT LEADERSHIP

People are sometimes illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered. Love them anyway, as Christ did.

If you do good, people might accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Do good anyway, as Christ did.

If you are successful, you can win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway, as Christ did.

The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway, as Christ did.

Honesty and frankness can make you vulnerable. Be honest anyway, as Christ was.

The biggest people with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest people with the smallest ideas. Think big anyway, as Christ did.

People favor underdogs but follow top dogs. Fight for the underdogs anyway, as Christ did.

What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. Build anyway, as Christ did.

People who need help may attack you if you help them. Help them anyway, as Christ did.

Give the world the best you have and you may get kicked in the teeth, or even crucified. Give your best anyway, as Christ did.

-- Based on the Paradoxical Commandments by Kent M. Keith, adapted by Rev. David T. Wilkinson


#4782

OUR NEED FOR NEIGHBORS

"Never abandon a friend -- either yours or your father’s. When disaster strikes, you won’t have to ask your brother for assistance. It’s better to go to a neighbor than to a brother who lives far away." (Proverbs 27:10 NLT)

Often it takes a moment of crisis to wake us up to our need for others, making us aware of the interdependence that is a natural part of being human. When things are going well, we tend to live an illusion of independence, not only from God but also from our fellow human beings. As long as life moves smoothly forward, we tend to think we can handle everything on our own. However, a passing storm -- any kind of setback or crisis -- reminds us that we need help.

-- Sarah Parsons in “A Clearing Season”


#4690

HELPING ONE ANOTHER

“Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!”  (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 ESV)

Picture two travelers in the desert. One is dying of thirst. The other has a huge jug of water, but he’s exhausted from carrying it. Eventually, one dies of thirst, then the other of fatigue.

All right, it’s a gloomy ending. Let’s try it another way. The thirsty man says, “”Hey, why not give me a drink and I’ll help you carry your jug?” That’s all it would take for both to survive.

Many in our society are like the first two travelers. We guard our independence. We strive to be self-sufficient. We don’t want to need each other. But if we’re going to survive in these changing times, we must leave rugged individualism behind. We’re not meant to go it alone. We can help one another. Each of us has resources to offer.

-- David Mains, Marian Oliver, Randy Peterson in “Survival Skills for Changing Times”

#4354

ACCEPTING A HELPING HAND

“You guide me with Your counsel, leading me to a glorious destiny.” (Psalm 73:24 NLT)

When a steamship enters the harbor and seeks to dock, they call for a "pilot" to come aboard and steer the vessel to port...

We have all seen pictures of beautiful luxury liners steaming into New York harbor. They are splendid, gleaming, smooth, and self-sufficient -- until they get close to land. Then tiny little tugboats come alongside and gently nudge them toward the dock. These tiny boats ease them in the right direction so that their docking is safe and secure.

These ships are no less magnificent because they accepted help from a friendly little tugboat. We are no less magnificent if we, too, accept a helping hand [when we are in physical, emotional or spiritual need.]

-- Ted Menten in “After Goodbye”


#4246

LET US WORSHIP AND ADORE HIM

All Hail! Lord, we greet Thee,
Born this happy morning,
O Jesus! for evermore be Thy name adored.
Word of the Father, now in flesh appearing;
O come, let us adore Him,
O come, let us adore Him,
O come, let us adore Him,
Christ the Lord.  (“O Come All Ye Faithful”)

Jesus Christ -- His love we can experience; His salvation we can appropriate; His help we can claim; but their remains in Him the divine mystery of the Incarnation, which is beyond our understanding, and before which we can only worship and adore.

-- William Barclay (1907-1978) in “The Revelation of John” (Vol.II)


#4242

CALMING THE STORM

If you’ve ever been caught in a powerful storm [as I was with hurricane Jeanne in 2004], you know that chaos reigns… Swirling winds and flying debris. Chaos. That is what storms produce. Not just the ones that form in the sky, but also the ones that form in our lives.

I was reminded of this when I spoke with a young woman whose marriage is in deep trouble because of her husband’s infidelity. Her swirling emotions have her leaning first one way and then another. One day she wants to fight her husband, and the next day she wants to strangle him. And talk about flying debris! The verbal hand grenades they’re lobbing at each other are throwing shrapnel and leaving wounds that will likely take years to heal.

Can you relate? Are you caught in a storm of your own right now? Do you find that shifting emotional winds have you leaning first one way and then another? Have you been coldcocked by flying debris? Have things become so confusing that you don’t even know what’s right anymore? And are you so weary of it all that you almost don’t even care? If so, remember that our Lord’s words can bring order out of chaos…

Right now, before the storm batters you another day, I urge you to cast your lot with the psalmist, who said, “I am counting on the Lord; yes, I am counting on Him. I have put my hope in His word.” (Psalm 130:5)

His words calm storms.

-- Mark Atteberry in “Free Refill: Coming Back to Jesus for More”

#4161

CALLING ON GOD

To enter God's refuge, we must first call out to God.  Psalm 91:15 says, "He shall call upon Me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him and honor him."

For the life of me, I can't figure out how this calling-on-God thing works, but it does.  The Bible tells us to walk by faith, not by sight, and this is one of those times when we can't understand why something works, we can only trust in God and then be delighted when we experience it.

For centuries now, Christians have poured out their hearts to the Lord and found treasured moments of refuge.  This is incredibly good news.  We don't have to get out a map, calculate how far away each one of the cities of refuge is, and then embark on a journey.  We don't have to drive to a monastery.  We don't have to call a minister.  We don't have to wait until the next church service.  The front seat of our cars will work nicely.  Our offices, our homes, our construction trailers -- they're all as good as the most elaborate cathedral.  We can access the refuge of God anytime, anywhere.  All we have to do is to acknowledge our need, move from self-sufficiency to dependence, and ask God to become our hiding place.

-- Bill Hybels in “The God You're Looking For”


#4111

WHERE THERE IS NEED, THERE IS GOD

Just as water is ever seeking the lowest depths in order to fulfill them, so is Jehovah ever seeking out [our] need in order to satisfy it. Where there is need, there is God. Where there is sorrow, misery, unhappiness, suffering, confusion, folly, oppression, there is the I AM, yearning to turn [our] sorrow into bliss whenever [we] will let Him. It is not, therefore, the hungry seeking for bread, but the Bread seeking the hungry; not the sad seeking for joy, but rather Joy seeking the sad; not emptiness seeking fullness, but rather Fullness seeking emptiness. And it is not merely that God supplies our need, but He Himself becomes the fulfillment of our need.

-- Roy and Revell Hession in We Would See Jesus


#4044

THE MIND OF CHRIST

“If any of you lacks wisdom let him ask of God, who gives to all generously.”  (James 1:5 NASB)

Periodically, we find ourselves at a loss to know what to do or how to respond. It’s then we ask for help, and God delivers more than intelligence and ideas and good old common sense. He dips into His well of wisdom and allows us to drink from His bucket, whose refreshment provides abilities and insights that are of another world. Perhaps it might best be stated as having a small portion of the “mind of Christ.”

-- Charles Swindoll in Bedside Blessings

#4043

MY STRENGTH AND MY HELP

“The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in Him, and He helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise Him.” (Psalm 28:7 NIV)

A story is told about a boy who valiantly, but unsuccessfully, attempted to move a heavy log to clear a pathway to his favorite hideout. His dad stood quietly nearby, watching his son straining against the load. Finally he said, "Son, why aren't you using all of your strength?"

Confused and a little angry, the boy responded, "Dad, I'm using every last little bit of strength I have!"

"No, son, you're not," his dad quietly responded. "You haven't asked me to help."

God is standing by at the ready, watching us trying to do it all on our own. He is asking us, “My child, why aren't you using all of your strength?" He is waiting for us to simply ask for His help and His strength. And when we do, joy bursts from our heart and praise from our lips.

-- David T. Wilkinson

#3913

COMING TO THE END OF OURSELVES

It's engrained in our culture that we're supposed to take care of business on our own, without seeking assistance. Maybe that's why one of the most beloved of all Bible verses isn't actually in the Bible. Yes, it's this chestnut: "God helps those who help themselves." Just about everyone knows that one. People quote it, they love it, they try to live it, but it never crosses their minds that it can't be found in the Scripture.

Maybe God forgot to put it in? I don't think so. A better explanation is that God actually helps those who can't help themselves. God helps those who stop in the midst of crisis and ask someone to assist them. When we're helpless and we know it, we're open to receive the transforming help He wants to give us. When we come to the end of ourselves, we find Him there waiting to give us what we have been so desperate for all along.

-- Kyle Idleman in The End of Me

#3872

INTERRUPTIONS TO OUR SCHEDULE

Jesus wants us to see that the neighbor next door or the people sitting next to us on a plane or in a classroom are not interruptions to our schedule. They are there by divine appointment.  Jesus wants us to see their needs, their loneliness, their longings, and He wants to give us the courage to reach out to them.

-- Rebecca Manley Pippert

#3830

FOCUSED ON JESUS

"But when Peter noticed the strong wind,^* he became frightened, and beginning to sink, he cried out, 'Lord, save me!' ³¹Jesus immediately reached out His hand and caught him, saying to him, 'You of little faith, why did you doubt?'"  (Matthew 14:30-31)

God calls us to be so focused on Jesus that, even if we are in the midst of a crisis, even if there are very real dangers around, we will remain calm, knowing that our focus on God always keeps us from sinking.

-- Copyright Eric Folkerth 1999. All Rights Reserved. (Used with Permission)

#3798