THE APOSTLE OF LOVE

The Gospel-writer John has often been nicknamed “the apostle of love.” Indeed, he wrote more than any other New Testament author about the importance of love – laying particular stress on the Christian’s love for Christ, Christ’s love for His church, and the love for one another that is supposed to be the hallmark of true believers. The theme of love flows through his writings.

But love was a quality that he learned from Christ, not something that came naturally to him. In his younger years, he was as much a Son of Thunder as James. If you imagine that John was the way he was often portrayed in medieval art -- a meek, mild, pale-skinned, effeminate person, lying around at Jesus’ shoulder looking up at Him with a dove-eyed stare -- forget that caricature. He was rugged and hard-edged, just like the rest of the fishermen-disciples. And again, he was every bit as intolerant, ambitious, zealous, and explosive as his elder brother. In fact, the one and only time the synoptic Gospel writers recorded John speaking for himself, he displayed his trademark aggressive, self-assertive, impertinent intolerance. (See Mark 9:38.)…

So it is clear from the Gospel accounts that John was capable of behaving in the most sectarian, narrow-minded, unbending, reckless, and impetuous fashion. He was brash. He was aggressive. He was passionate, zealous, personally ambitious – just like his brother James. They were cut from the same cloth.

But John aged well. Under the control of the Holy Spirit, all his liabilities were exchanged for assets. Compare the young disciple with the aged patriarch, and you’ll see that as he matured, his areas of weakness all developed into his greatest strengths. He’s an amazing example of what should happen to us as we grow in Christ -- allowing the Lord’s strengths to be made perfect in our weakness. (See 2 Corinthians 12:9.) 

-- John MacArthur (1939-2025) in “Twelve Ordinary Men: How the Master Shaped His Disciples for Greatness and What He Wants to Do with You”

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THE WAY TO SPIRITUAL MATURITY

“We know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”  (Romans 5:3b-5 NIV)

Imagine you are walking through a garden and you notice a butterfly struggling to emerge from its cocoon. What would happen if, in an effort to help it, you took some scissors and snipped the cocoon away?

In a few hours you would witness a tragedy. The wings, shrunken and shriveled, would not fill out with all their potential beauty. Instead of developing into a creature free to fly, the butterfly would drag a broken body through its short life. The constricting cocoon and the struggle necessary to be free from it are God’s way of forcing fluid into the butterfly’s wings. The “merciful” snip would have been in reality quite cruel.

The way to spiritual maturity is often difficult and ugly, forcing us to embrace our poverty before God and our dependence upon Him. We must learn to struggle well, not avoid the fight while building a shining exterior. Sometimes the struggle is exactly what we need.  

-- Adapted from an article entitled “Not According to Plan” by Jeff Jernigan in Discipleship Journal, No. 67

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A CHARACTER OF KINDNESS

“The most important [commandment],” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.”  (Mark 12:39-42 NIV)

Many of us find that there is much more to life than getting and keeping. True fulfillment comes with the responsibilities we assume: to care for our families, and to love a neighbor as we want to be loved ourselves. This is more than a familiar saying; it is the foundation of a meaningful life.

A person shows his or her character in kindness and charity. And what is true in our lives is also true in the life of our nation. You can fairly judge the character of society by how it treats the weak, the vulnerable, the most easily forgotten. Our own country, at its best, strives to be compassionate, and this isn't easy. Compassion is not merely a vague feeling of empathy, it is a demanding virtue. It involves action and effort, and deep conviction - a conviction as old as Scripture and present at the founding of our country. We believe that everyone has a place and a purpose in this world, that every life matters, that no insignificant person was ever born.

 -- President George W. Bush, in the 2004 Commencement Address at Concordia University Wisconsin

GOD-SHAPED QUALITIES

“This is what we speak, not in words taught us by human wisdom but in words taught by the Spirit, explaining spiritual realities with Spirit-taught words… The person with the Spirit makes judgments about all things, but such a person is not subject to merely human judgments, for, ‘who has known the mind of the Lord so as to instruct him?’ But we have the mind of Christ.”  (1 Corinthians 2:13,15,16 NIV)

Humility, hospitality, and loving-kindness; simplicity and deliberation -- all are God-shaped qualities of life. To have all the mind that was in Christ, however, means that these qualities flow from Christ’s holiness and righteousness in us through loving actions toward others. 

-- Paul Wesley Chilcote in “A Life-Shaping Prayer: 52 Meditations in the Wesleyan Spirit”

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SUMMING UP CHARACTER

Character comes from the Greek word describing a marking and engraving instrument. The picture is of an artist who wears a groove on a metal plate by repeatedly etching in the same place with a sharp tool. My character is forged as a set of distinctive marks that, when taken together, draw a portrait of who I really am.

Behavior and character are linked together, but they are not the same thing. Behavior is what I do, one action at a time. “I behaved badly in that situation.” Character is the sum of all my behavior, both public and private, arranged as patterns across the entire spectrum of my life. Any behavior, duplicated and reduplicated, forms a part of my character.

Repeated patterns of behavior wear a series of grooves, which, when put together, form a portrait of me as a person or show a picture of my character…

I have control over my character. I can improve it, change it, modify it, and compromise it. In a world where we seem to have little control, we call the shots when it comes to whether or not our character is diminished. Job said to his friends concerning his character: “I will not deny my integrity. I will maintain my righteousness and never let go of it; my conscience will not reproach me as long as I live.” (Job 27:5-6)

If my character goes down, I am the only one who can be blamed. No other person apart from me can allow my character to be compromised.  

-- Dr. Stephen Graves and Dr. Thomas Addington in “A Case for Character”

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EMISSARIES OF GRACE

“We’re Christ’s representatives. God uses us to persuade men and women to drop their differences and enter into God’s work of making things right between them. We’re speaking for Christ Himself now: Become friends with God; He’s already a friend with you.”  (2 Corinthians 5:20 MSG)

Christian character reflects our relationship with Christ. We learn and build Christian character as we grow closer to God and follow His directives. We still have our individual personalities, but they develop into a godly version – a better version of ourselves – the person God created us to be. We grow in Christian character as we walk with God, dive into His Word, and spend time with Him in prayer. Christian character should display Christ to those around us – we are His emissaries of grace!

We have to be intentional about developing Christian character. Every day we make choices that will either grow our Christian character or send it into a slump. Our life circumstances are where God builds character, but we have to cooperate with Him in the effort. We are often confronted with issues and situations that tempt us to act out in ways that are the opposite of Christian character – we might want to fight back, get even, use foul language, get angry, and so on. We have to make the conscience choice to respond in a Christlike way. 

-- Author Unknown, from biblereasons.com

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FORMING THE GREATEST CHARACTER

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your minds, so that you may [discover] what is the will of God -- what is good and acceptable and perfect.”  (Romans 12:2 NRSV)

The study of God's Word, for the purpose of discovering God's will, is the secret discipline which has formed the greatest characters.

-- James W. Alexander

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DETERMINED -- NOT STUBBORN

Determination is a hallmark of godly character.  God doesn't want His people to be hopeless and discouraged -- rather He expects them to be faithful and persistent.  "For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline" (2 Timothy 1:7).  However, neither does God want His people to be stubborn.  Let's be careful not to confuse stubbornness with determination.  Whereas stubbornness is like a mule kicking and balking at every turn, determination is like a racehorse striving to cross the finish line victoriously.  According to Scripture, a stubborn heart is disobedient (Romans 10:21), foolish (Ephesians 4:18) and destined to be destroyed (Proverbs 29:1). 

-- Dr. Norm Wakefield & Jody Brolsma in “Men Are from Israel, Women Are from Moab” 

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CHARACTER MATTERS

“For I command you today to love the LORD your God, to walk in obedience to Him, and to keep His commands, decrees and laws; then you will live and increase, and the LORD your God will bless you in the land you are entering to possess.”   (Deuteronomy 30:16 NIV)

Does character really matter? The collective wisdom of the ages would say it matters a great deal. In both classical and biblical cultures -- civilizations that have been so deeply formative to our own -- people well understood there to be a direct association between the character of individuals and the well-being of the society as a whole. Individual character was essential to decency, order, and justice within public life. Without it, hardship was not far off. … Indeed, much of the history of the ancient Hebrews can be told as a story of blessing for faithfulness to God -- abiding by God’s standard of holiness -- and punishment for abandoning those standards.  

-- James Davison Hunter in “The Death of Character”

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GOD’S TRAINING GROUND

“We continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of His will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives, so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please Him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God…”  (Colossians 1:9b-10 NIV)

We presume that we would be ready for battle if confronted with a great crisis, but it is not the crisis that builds something within us -- it simply reveals what we are made of already. Do you find yourself saying, “If God calls me to battle, of course I will rise to the occasion”? Yet you won’t rise to the occasion unless you have done so on God’s training ground [of worship, Bible study, and prayer]. If you are not doing the task that is closest to you now, which God has engineered into your life, when the crisis comes, instead of being fit for battle, you will be revealed as being unfit. Crises always reveal a person’s true character.

-- Oswald Chambers in “My Utmost for His Highest”


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CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT

“We also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.”  (Romans 5:3-4 NIV)

Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired, and success achieved.

-- Helen Keller's Journal 


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ONE STEP AT A TIME

“Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”  (Romans 5:1-5 NIV)

If you’re running a 26-mile marathon, remember that every mile is run one step at a time. If you are writing a book, do it one page at a time. If you’re trying to master a new language, try it one word at a time. There are 365 days in the average year. Divide any project by 365 and you’ll find that no job is all that intimidating.

-- Charles Swindoll


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OLYMPIC-LIKE TRIALS

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”  (James 1:2-4 NIV)

Trials, temptations, disappointments -- all these are helps instead of hindrances, if one uses them rightly. They not only test the fiber of a character, but strengthen it. Every conquered temptation represents a new fund of moral energy. Every trial endured and weathered in the right spirit makes a soul nobler and stronger than it was before.

-- James Buckham

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KEEPING OUR PRIORITIES STRAIGHT

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.”  (Philippians 2:3-4 NIV)

My dad has been a tremendous example for not only our family but the whole community because of his humility and his character. I've really looked up to him and respected him in his life. When you're in the spotlight, if you play sports at a high level, people will look up to you and it's kind of easy to get a big head. But he's taught me to keep my priorities straight with God being No. 1. God calls us to be humble and I think that's probably one of the main characteristics I look up to with my dad.

-- Michelle Munoz, talking about her dad, Hall of Fame football player Anthony Munoz, in Sports Spectrum


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YOUR GOOD DEEDS

"Your Father who sees in secret will Himself reward you openly."  (Matthew 6:4b)

God is the note-taking heavenly observer.  He knows about the time you bit your tongue when you could have contributed to a rumor.  He takes notice every time you greet a stranger or visit a person in the hospital or prison.  Every secret act of character, conviction, and courage has been observed in living color by our omniscient God.

You always have an audience.  In every activity and in every conversation God is present, and He says, "I saw it.  Carry on!  Do it again.  I am going to reward you.  I am going to repay you.  You have not been working in vain."

Obviously your good deeds won't make God love you more (His love for you is operating at "full strength" already), but it's good to know He celebrates your good deeds -- even when they go unnoticed by others.

-- Bill Hybels in The God You're Looking For

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WHOLEHEARTED PERSEVERANCE

What is so striking about a determined spirit?  Why do stories of courage and tenacity inspire us?  Why do we seek out and follow heroes who model wholehearted perseverance?  How does another person's determination motivate us toward excellence?

The Bible clearly shows that perseverance is an outward expression of good character or integrity.  Whether it's called courage, tenacity, resolve, determination, steadfastness or persistence -- God calls us to model a commitment to Him and His plans.

"Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope" (Romans 5:3-4).

-- Dr. Norm Wakefield & Jody Brolsma in Men Are from Israel, Women Are from Moab

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A TROJAN HORSE

"Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice." (Ephesians 4:31)

A Trojan Horse sits just outside the gate of your heart.  Its mane is bitterness.  It is a monument to every attack you have endured from your fellow human beings.  It is a gift left by the people who have wronged you.  It is a monument to the pain, the sorrow, and the devastation they have caused you.  It represents the debt they will owe you until the day they are brought to justice.  It is rightfully yours.

But to accept the gift is to invite ruin into your life.  You see, there is more to the horse than meets the eye.  The feeling of justification it brings is the deceptive artistry of a master craftsman.  Though decorated with the promise of vindication, it is only a lure.  The celebration is short-lived.  Once inside the walls of your heart, it releases its agents of destruction. Its plot quietly unfolds from the inside out.  To become a person of character, you must learn to recognize the Trojan Horse of bitterness.  And more important, you must never bring it inside.

-- Andy Stanley in Like a Rock

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THE AMBIGUOUS GIFTS OF SUFFERING

"More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit which has been given to us." (Romans 5:3-5 RSV)

One of the ambiguous gifts of our suffering (and they are ambiguous: they are gifts, and we would never have chosen them) is that it enlarges our perspective.  Petty complaints we had seem unimportant. People with whom we thought we had nothing in common become special friends.  Vocational prowess drops down on the list of our life's priorities; relationships are what matter.

At the same time that we feel more profoundly and gratefully connected to friends and family, we have a sense that all of us dwell in mystery, that we are connected to earth and sky, to the rhythms of the universe, to the whole range of living things in ways we do not understand.

Maybe I can relinquish my "white knuckle" grip on life, and trust that all will be well.

-- Martha Whitmore Hickman in Healing After Loss


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DEVELOPING CHARACTER

Character qualities in His children -- that's God's relentless quest. His strobe light will continue to penetrate our darkness. He won't quit His quest until He completes His checklist. And when will that be? When we rest in peace… and not one day sooner. Only then will His mission be accomplished in us. We have Him to thank for not giving up as we go through the process of developing character. Thanks, Lord.

-- Charles R. Swindoll in The Quest for Character


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GOOD CHARACTER

A good character is the best tombstone. Those who loved you and were helped by you will remember you when forget-me-nots have withered. Carve your name on hearts, not on marble.

-- Charles Spurgeon

 
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