IN THE END, THE EXCLAMATION POINT

“Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting? But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.”  (1 Corinthians 15:55,57 NIV)

Several years ago, I received a phone call from a young woman in my congregation, asking if I could go to the hospital to see her… For several months she had experienced upsetting symptoms, but had charged them off as related to pregnancy and delivery… She was a victim, her doctors reported, of multiple sclerosis…

There are times when it is very difficult to be a parish pastor. If you care about people and want to help them, you dread those moments when almost anything you say will seem trivial. If you’re a medical doctor, you can begin outlining a series of treatment or medication, even if both of you know that it’s only a stopgap. But when you’re a pastor, you deal only in words and in the intangibles of faith; and you’re afraid that any words you speak at such a moment will be inane, and that if you try to convey faith, your words won’t be heard. You wish, often, that faith could be bottled or packaged in some physical form, so you could hand it to a person, and they in turn could grasp it, then perhaps take it like a capsule, three times a day, with a glass of water.

But suddenly -- I shall always credit it to the Holy Spirit – a sentence came to me, and I spoke it. “Multiple sclerosis isn’t the last word,” I said. “It isn’t even the next-to-last word. The next-to-last word is faith, and the last word is God.” We talked a while longer, and we prayed. But most of all we remembered that the last word, always and always, is God. The devil will seek to push any number of counterfeits upon us, to persuade us that we have come to an end. But it is never the end until we have said God. And after God comes the exclamation point…

Because that’s the way it ends if you place yourself in Jesus Christ, because He has made an ultimate end to death. No comma or semicolon, no poor period, no fumbling ellipsis, and surely no question mark. An exclamation point! Thanks be to God, an exclamation point! 

-- J. Ellsworth Kalas, excerpted from a sermon entitled “In the End, the Exclamation Point”, February 28, 1990

A DIVINE INTERSECTION

“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Henceforth there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, will award to me on that Day, and not only to me but also to all who have loved His appearing.”  (2 Timothy 4:7-8 ESV)

Preparing for a death by creating meaningful rituals encourages emotional catharsis and spiritual release. And acknowledging family dynamics, in spite of the helpless and painful feelings, helps us move toward a resolution, however imperfect it may be.

We are fortunate when we have the time – the luxury, really – to say goodbye, particularly if it’s under the guidance of hospice workers, chaplains and pastors. These are the people who teach us that the end of life requires an awareness that transcends the confines of traditional medicine… Palliative care is based on this principle, in the tending to the physical, emotional, and spiritual needs of the dying, in the recognition of the mystery of life’s final cycle, and in the realization that there is a time to hold on and a time to let go. Coming to terms with these very basic tenets will better prepare us for the two roles that we must each adopt over the course of our lives – as the living with the dying and as the dying with the living. Though our scripts will differ, our need to understand them will not.

Death forces a grace period for us all. In a “divine intersection” the dying offer the living a final chance to be the best that they can be. We must take our cues from them, value the moments that lead up to and follow their departure, and work toward acceptance after they are gone. This is a vow as sacred as any we will make over the course of our lifetime. 

-- Adapted from “In Lieu of Flowers: A Conversation for the Living” by Nancy Cobb

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THE GIFT OF DEPARTING IN PEACE

“There was a man in Jerusalem whose name was Simeon, and this man was just and devout, waiting for the Consolation of Israel, and the Holy Spirit was upon him. And it had been revealed to him by the Holy Spirit that he would not see death before he had seen the Lord’s Christ. So he came by the Spirit into the temple. And when the parents brought in the Child Jesus, to do for Him according to the custom of the law, he took Him up in his arms and blessed God and said: ‘Lord, now You are letting Your servant depart in peace, according to Your word; for my eyes have seen Your salvation which You have prepared before the face of all peoples, a light to bring revelation to the Gentiles, and the glory of Your people Israel.’”  (Luke 2:25-32 NKJV)

Death stood at the door. This dear old man hovered in the valley of the shadow. I had been called to his bedside by the family to be present for his final hours. His sister-in-law, who had kept a constant vigil of love, told me he had made a death wish some months ago. “As I get near the end,” he had said, “I have my doubts about many things in life. But I hope I can leave this earth with dignity… my faith in God is stronger than ever.”

She showed me a picture of him from earlier years. He seemed so vibrant and full of life then, and now so forlorn and hopeless, gasping for that final breath. Then he was gone. I held his hand until his hold ended, almost symbolic of giving up and letting go. But he died in dignity. No respirator kept him from his date with destiny or his meeting with the God he loved. There was the sadness of farewell, but also gratitude that his wish had been granted.

We all proceed every day to our final destiny. If we are wise, we will accept its finality with gratitude; if we are sensible we prepare for it now. If we are blessed “for my eyes have seen Your salvation,” we will depart, as Simeon prayed, in peace. 

– Adapted from Richard L. Morgan in “Autumn Wisdom”

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